Sunday, April 1, 2012

Imagining Love

There are some things our human brains just aren't capable of understanding no matter how hard we try.  When I think about heaven my imagination only goes so far before it stops abruptly on the edge of a ledge.  Thinking about how something that seems as simple as a honey bee is so complex and the same God who made them capable of finding their way back to their hives by the position of the sun in the sky also created and loves me is mind blowing.

The same is true when I try to imagine you Henry.  For quite some time now you have consumed the majority of my thoughts.  I think about how much I love you and how much more I will love you each day of my life.  I think alot about your little tiny feet, chubby toes, sweet wrinkled hands, the back of your little neck with the peach fuzz on it.  What I can't imagine is your face.  Try as I may picturing what your face looks like is impossible to my little human brain.  We have this 3D picture of you from your 18 week ultrasound, yet I know you will look different, fuller, real, and will take my breath away. 

My brain can't understand the journey that will lead you to us tomorrow and the mental, emotional, and physical roller coaster that is about to take place makes me more than anxious.  I just can't wait to be on the other side of it all. To hold you in my arms as your mommy will be a life changing moment that all other moments in my life will be measured by.  Tomorrow we begin that journey sweet baby boy.  Until then my eyes and brain await your awakening of our senses.  I love you forever. 

Your Mommy

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